Pregnancy update here we are again! It feels like I only just posted the last one- the weeks are flying by (not that i’m complaining!). So I am 28 weeks pregnant this week- 7 MONTHS EEEEK! We are into the third trimester now! Crazy times! The end is in sight (kind of!).
So, my 27th week started off with me at the hospital having a Glucose Tolerance Test, for those of you who know all about what that is- yeah, you’ll feel my pain here it sucks doesn’t it!! For those of you who don’t- it’s a test for gestational diabetes and you fast from the previous night and you get given a sugary glucose drink to see how your body processes it… you have two blood tests, one before the drink and one afterwards. It is a two hour test and you have to sit about waiting/resting until the time is up… Doesn’t sound that much but all I can say about this is I WAS STARVING! I never realised how much I would start to feel emotional and angry at the world because I couldn’t eat! All I wanted, fantasised and drooled over was a posh coffee and something lovely, preferably doused in cinnamon to shovel down my throat, calming my inner food demon who was screaming out for sustenance! It wasn’t even just the not eating that stressed me, it was the fact I couldn’t even take anything for the heartburn during the night, it felt like someone was holding a lighter to my throat, choking me! Eurgh it’s nasty! I thought I would be clever in the hours leading up to the fasting by stuffing my face in the hope it would last all night and I wouldn’t feel as hungry the next morning, until I sat in my gluttony realising that I couldn’t take any Gaviscon! Lessons learned! Turns out, after all of the drama, i’m not diabetic woohoo! One thing ticked off the pregnancy antenatal checklist!
I have also had another appointment this week, and that was a care team meeting to plan my care for when I have the baby. It was about my current mental health, and also planning and preparing for the postpartum period in case of deterioration like I had with Alfie. Apparently I am a high risk for relapse (approx 1 in 2 will become unwell again after a subsequent birth), and we have planned that hospital admission will be a last resort (thank the lord!) and have put other things in place to hopefully make sure we don’t get to that stage at all! I am feeling very nervous about it all at this point, as recently, my anxieties have started creeping back in, and my mood has been fairly shitty so we’ll just see how it goes but hopefully it won’t happen, but if it does, I know I have amazing support around me, from the Mental Health team, Health Visitor, Midwife and Family/Friends. People are aware of what happened after having Alfie and are now more informed about what to look out for this time, and how best to go about supporting me with it. I have a bit of a decision to make in the meantime, and that is all about breastfeeding and medication- it’s a really hard decision to make because I want to breastfeed this time around, as I couldn’t last time… but I can’t take the majority of psychiatric medications if I want to breastfeed, so treatment options are limited so we’ll see what happens and take it day by day. I’m staying positive for now, and a good friend of mine reminds me that although I am a high risk percentage for relapse, I am by no means a statistic so i’ll replay her words to myself and take note!
Going into the third trimester, i’m still feeling pretty much the same as last time I updated, things are aching, bladder is pushed to capacity on an hourly basis, and my sleep is shit. Talking of shit, there isn’t much of that happening either- oh such joy. I am getting bigger and loving my growing bump, it’s huge! I am also feeling lots of fetal movement which is amazing and i’m so in love with the feeling it still sends me to mush when I feel him, no matter how many times I have felt it before, it’s still just as special as the first time! He is a strong boy when he wants to be and likes to give me a good whack, mostly at night so I look forward to crawling into bed because I know that he starts jumping around and I can go to sleep with total contentment- that is, until he treats my bladder like a trampoline at 3am! Only tricky thing, is that I have a high anterior placenta, so some days I have periods of him being very quiet, or his movements are cushioned so it’s difficult to always feel him and learn a pattern of movements so I get a bit freaked out from time to time. I am starting to feel a weird sensation every so often this week that is all too familiar from Alfie’s pregnancy… Feels like electric shocks or a sharp knife being jabbed into my cervix from the inside… as if his feet are going to literally fall out of my vagina? It takes me by surprise and is a feeling so bizarre, I can’t really explain it but if you have had this, you will know exactly what I mean! Either it’s the baby, or just my shit pelvic floor muscles about to give in when the baby moved a certain way! I’ve only really heard people who carried boys say they have felt this so maybe it’s a gender specific thing? Who knows!
I am doing fairly well with my diet this time around, i’m not shovelling food into my face like I did with Alfie’s pregnancy as if we were facing a food shortage. I am more sensible I think and more aware of the fact that the weight won’t just come off, as I was under the illusion last time! I stupidly thought it was called “baby weight” for that reason!I also feel a bit more relaxed about food, whereas last time I would check everything to make sure it was allowed, I think second time around you aren’t as paranoid maybe? I have had some treat foods and if I want to indulge a bit I don’t think that is necessarily a bad thing, because now I know when to stop! I can’t eat too much now anyway because after a few mouthfuls of food, it feels like my dinner is sitting in my chest because everything is all high up and squashed.
I’m feeling a bit more organised this week as well, we have pretty much everything we need for baby and I am starting to get an idea of what i’ll be packing in the bags for the hospital. I still find myself wanting to pack the most random of things, but I feel like you can’t go wrong if you overpack- it’s better than forgetting or leaving things out that you might want later. I like to have my comforts around me, especially my favourite beauty products because it just gives me a boost and if you feel nice and smell nice, that can’t be a bad thing! Some people will be reading this thinking “what planet is she on, she is having a baby- who cares what you look like?” But to me, I CARE! I will have just pushed a human out of my vagina and will be wearing an adult nappy so, I am one of these people who want to look nice on the outside at least, feel nice and definitely smell nice! Giving birth has you at your most vulnerable I think, you are going through a huge change physically and mentally, and although my way of thinking is not for everyone, having the little things that make you feel human, or things that you like is so important. You don’t just stop being you. I know that if I have those few bits with me, I can retain my dignity and feel a bit more alive afterwards! Whether its makeup, fancy shampoo, lotions and potions- pack what you love! Screw what anyone else says- I had a full face of makeup on when I gave birth to Alfie and some people laugh at that but I really don’t care about any of that, I looked better on those first pictures than i would have otherwise- I hid the sweaty, tired, red faced mess that I really was and to me that was important. Remember it is your birthing experience, no one else’s! We all do things differently and no way is right or wrong!
So next week, i’ll be doing a topic post and my next pregnancy update will be in a couple of weeks, as at this stage, there isn’t really many changes and I don’t want to be repetitive!
Thanks for reading and as always,